Great Quotes - Funny Quotes - Love Quotes
Be inspired by our amazing collection of free proverbs, sayings and great quotes by famous artists, authors, writers, poets, philosophers and business people. The quotation database contains over 150,000 funny quotes, love quotes and motivational quotes that will do for any occasion. The database is constantly updated with new quotes, proverbs and sayings. Make sure to check our quotes regularly.
Try our free search of constantly updated quotations and proverbs database.
Letter "J" » Johnny Carson Quotes
«If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.»
«I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.»
«Talent alone won't make you a success. Neither will being in the right place at the right time, unless you are ready. The most important question is: 'Are your ready?''»
«Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die.»
«If variety if the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam»
«Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.»
«The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money»
«Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.»
«He couldn't ad-lib a fart after a baked-bean dinner»
«I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.»